The death of a loved one can be so hard to the people left behind. But what may help is knowing the person isn't really gone at all. They are still watching and waiting and try to let you know they are ok by sending little signs. This doesn't take the hurt away, but it can ease it. Knowing they are with Spirit and whole can be a comfort. When you're ready to release them and start to heal ask Spirit for help and you will be guided and comforted. Peace for yourself and the passed loved one can become a prayer. Some people light a candle daily and that gives comfort on both sides.
When a loved one has passed their physical body is no longer needed but the spiritual body doesn't change. Some people call it the soul, others call it the spirit, whatever you call it, it still exists and their personality as you knew it doesn't change. They are the same person, they just now have a higher, more divine, perspective of things. So any hate, unforgiveness or areas in their life lacking love are washed away and they can see that we are all one, each just trying to make it here in the physical with the knowledge we have. Your loved ones want to see you happy and in joy and love and living life to the fullest with the gift you have left of time and physical being.
When you think of your passed love one, they can hear your thoughts and know your mind, or your awareness, is on them. When you think of them, don't think about how sick they may have been before passing, or what may have occurred to cause their passing, they really don't want to "relive" that with you. What they do want is for you to heal from their passing and remember them with joy, peace and love, remembering the good times spent together. You can even still talk to them, they'll hear you. If you need to say you're sorry for something or want more understanding from them regarding a hurt, let them know. They'll hear and accept an apology and if you keep your heart and mind open, you will hear their response or gentle guidance towards an answer.
When someone is sick a long time before passing this can make the grieving process go a little faster. It's almost like you know it's coming so you're able to say things and heal things you might not have gotten time for with a sudden passing. It doesn't mean you don't miss them any less, it just means you may have started the grieving process while they were still here and so you can truly be happy for them and love them for the fact that they are no longer suffering. Sudden passings, especially of young ones can be very hard to take and hard to understand. But again, they are ok, they are made whole and just want you to know they love you and want you to continue on with life in all its fullness. They are still with you and just want to watch you being happy.
Grief from a divorce or sudden betrayal can feel like the death of a loved one. When two people are not happy and decide to go separate ways, that makes it a little easier to take. Divorce doesn't have to be a messy hate fest. But when a spouse finds the other has been cheating or asks for a divorce completely out of the blue, that can be devastating as well. The person you love and thought you knew has metaphorically died and left you. This is real grief also and takes time to heal from. In this type of grief, find your comfort from family, friends and of course, Spirit. God is a better source for finding your happiness and healing than a rebound or one-night-stand or alcohol, etc. Seek Him first.
Try this technic to help with healing on a deep level when grieving from a child moving forward into life, when a loved one is traveling (physically or passing into the spiritual realm), or when healing from a divorce: Visualize the person wherever they may be or look at the most recent picture of them when they are healthy, happy and smiling and imagine them as safe, whole and in a state of peace or joy. See in your mind, them smiling; then, send them love from your heart, or feel the love of Spirit pouring into you and coming out through your heart, to them. Then you can repeat out loud or in your mind "Love and Blessings" until you feel better, sending them that energy. Know this has empowered them and helped them to open to God's love and you should also be open and feel so much better.
I know this may be hard for someone healing from a divorce, but can be very helpful and beneficial for deep healing. It can help you to release blocks and hatred, hurt and resentments, blaming and victim mentality. Even if you may be the victim, living in that space and that mental capacity has never helped anyone live a happy life, you have to let that go. You have to decide that your story doesn't involve victim mentality and write a new story for your life of love, peace and happiness. If you repeat this process every day while going through the divorce, you'll probably not only feel better and heal faster, you'll be able to approach the whole situation from a different perspective.
Practicing this technic instead of repeating the story over and over to different people will make you feel better. Don't relive the experience or affirm it's power over you by repeating it. When you hear yourself repeat the story of how you were wronged and hurt, and the affects of it in your life, you're imprinting that over and over in your mind and in your "life story". To get it out of you try journaling, write it down and burn it, or talk to one close friend who won't let you stay stuck in your misery for too long, but you don't need to tell the world about it. Feel it, process it, heal it, let it go....just don't stay stuck in it.
Please feel free to share or talk about your experiences with grief. If you try the technic please share your experience with that and how it helped you. Remember healing from grief can be a slow process and that's ok. Be gentle and loving with yourself as you go through it and know you'll heal in time and ask for God's help, He always ready to help and so are your passed loved ones and angels. Peace & Light.
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