Once you start to forgive yourself its easier to start to forgive others. When anger, grudges and resentments are held onto, that negative energy becomes stored in the body. When held onto for long periods of time it sometimes tries to free itself and manifests as physical illness. Any illness is a call to look at the unforgiven parts of the past and offer up that forgiveness. When the illness leaves, the feeling of renewal is left.
Look at the people in your life that you are holding grudges against; they have wronged you in some way or done something you don't agree with, its time to let that go. When you think of the person(s), notice the feelings and emotions taking place in your body; feel how heavy and negative they are. If you've read the earlier posts about these kinds of emotions then you already know you don't want them and are on the right path to letting them go.
The strongest part about forgiveness is its power to free you from all those thoughts, anxieties and energy zapping emotions. You can free yourself whether the person being forgiven knows it or not. They may not have asked for forgiveness, they may not want your forgiveness, but you still have the power to grant it and release yourself from those ties. You no longer have to be tied to these people! Cutting the cords starts with forgiving them. Forgiveness truly is for the self more than the other person!
Sometimes its hard to forgive someone because if they are forgiven and you no longer have a place to point blame the time comes to stop and look at the part you played in it all. This is where self forgiveness steps back into the picture to be able to really let it all go. When you can step out of the situation and really try to see all sides unbiasedly, not only are you being the stronger and more mature person, you are healing the situation, offering forgiveness to others involved and healing and forgiving yourself. You have then reclaimed your power and renewed your soul.
There are times when this process has to be repeated. You may think you've forgiven and healed, but sometimes fate steps into make sure you have cleared out all the shadows. You may see the person you've worked on forgiving after not speaking to or seeing them for years! What happens when you see them? Do all the "forgiven" things come back up? Do all the negative feelings and emotions surrounding this person come up? If so, then go back to the drawing board and work on healing and forgiving again.
Eventually you should get to the point where seeing or hearing about the person no longer emotionally charges you. You'll develop a non-reaction to their presence and situations. By no means am I saying you have to become friends with the person or develop a relationship with them. If you are lead to do so and it appears the other person has also grown and moved forward, then that would be a wonderful outcome! But some people do not change in this life time and that's ok. Try to remain non-judgemental and continue to distance yourself from them, but be sure to forgive them so you can free yourself.
I hope all of that makes since and helps you start to heal your relationships with others as well as your past. I hope you are able to really forgive and move forward in your life claiming ALL of your power! Please feel free to leave questions or comments below! Blessed be!
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